You know you're a third world mom when...

• You go to pick up your child from his nap he and his crib are covered, and I mean COVERED, with ants.  He isn't bothered by them, and if truth be told, probably considers them to be playmates.

• Your toddler throws an entire roll of toilet paper in the toilet.  You are more upset that it is the last roll of nice, plush, double roll American toilet paper than at your child's misbehavior.

• UHT processed, unrefrigerated shelf milk is all they have ever known.  (Blech)

• You put a capful of bleach into the bathtub with the kids every night.  You know, just in case.

• Peanut butter and jelly is a privilege, not a right.  

• Your kids don't even know what a real christmas tree looks like because the closest thing you could find is a Charlie Brown twig.  

• At a stoplight a beggar walks up to your window and knocks repeatedly and maybe even kisses your side mirror.  Your kids don't bat an eyelash.

• You start (painstakingly) making your own almond milk. 

• You let your kids ride in the front seat if you're driving within the neighborhood (i.e. no big or busy streets).  Upon arriving in country you were horrified to see the other American parents do this and swore you would NEVER stoop to such levels.  But it's awesome.

• You realize almost nothing in American parenting books applies.   

• McDonald's is a place you would actually take your kids to eat. 

Thanks Mary for helping me compile this list!

Paris: Third Time's the Charm?

Other possible title: In the Market for a Minivan.

No, we haven't been to Paris 3 times.  However, every time we have taken a couples-only trip to continental Europe, I have been pregnant.  That's right, there is another little friend in my tummy.

2008- Italy

2010- Italy

2013- Paris


The first time was a complete disaster.  It was our 5 year anniversary trip with our friends Sara and Allen.  I was 8 and 9 weeks pregnant and sick as a dog.  I laid in bed in the room while the others saw the sights.

The second time was fine.  It was a work trip for Joe and we found out we were pregnant with J on the trip.  No fatigue or nausea at 5 weeks.  But also, no more smooth Italian wine.

And the third.  Oh the third.  We should have known better.  I was 12 weeks at the time and thought I would be done with nausea, fatigue and wouldn't already be experiencing discomfort.  WRONG-O.

We had GREAT company, Sara and Allen again for our 10th anniversaries, that's 20 years all together.  But we subjected them to my less than stellar mood and poor physical sightseeing performance.  Bless their hearts for doing it a second time.

Thankfully, I was able to hit most of the sites and still take a rest each day.  The sad thing is that it was COLD and RAINY all week. I mean, COLD.  No cute Paris outfits from the suitcase.  I wore the one sweatshirt I brought over normal shirts and under my trench coat every day.

Is it wrong that the highlights of the trip for me were eating at Chipotle and arriving at the airport to travel home?

Side note 1: If I were coming from America I would have been ashamed to seek out the only Chipotle (new!) in France.  But by golly, when you're coming from Africa and have the opportunity to eat your favorite food....awesome.

Side note 2:  Joe was SO gracious to me on this trip.  He had been super excited about it for months, being a fluent French speaker and having spent time in another part of the country a couple of years ago.  And it was not so fun for him.  He spent his time searching out public restrooms, food I would eat and shuffling me up and down a metro that is not a fan of escalators.

So here's a few pics.  I know you have seen pics of the Eiffel Tower so I will probably stick to people pics.

Me and my beloved.

It got warm one day for about 10 minutes.  In Les Jardins des Tuileries.

Sara and I in front of Sacre Coeur.

Notre Dame

I found every possible spot to sit in Paris.

Arc de Triomphe

Taking a picture of all the people taking a picture of the Mona Lisa.  Which I don't understand.  Why do you want a picture of Mona Lisa on your iPad or snapshot camera when you could buy a print or look it up on the internet any time?  There were people in the Louvre that went around and took a photo of every painting.  Also, the Louvre: unbelievably beautiful and huge.  

One of Joe's artsy shots.

Side note 3:  The flight from Rabat to Paris and back might as well have been the cross town commuter bus.  ALL of the Moroccans knew each other and spent the flights in the aisles having social hour.  (Totally acceptable to flight crew.)  Joe was not immune from the situation.  He knew at least 3 people on our flights from his contacts around town.  I have never seen anything like it.

And Baby Dickerson #3?  Due Thanksgiving to an excited Mommy, Daddy and especially Big Brother G.  (Big Brother J oblivious).